"Dearest denizens of discerning drinks,In a landscape littered with lagers, ales, and those sweet nectarine brews that we all long for on an idle Wednesday evening (or is that just me? , this establishment stands tall, glistening like the froth atop a freshly poured pint. It 's the oasis for the thirsty traveler with a penchant for the truly local, the authentic, the artisanal! Indeed, their beer selection is like the Louvre if the Louvre was filled with hop laden masterpieces, all from our best neighborhood breweries. Every sip is a chorus of liquid legends, proclaiming: "Drink me, for I am the soul of this fine city! "Now, as for the food, I 've yet to dive deep into the menu 's vast offerings. But I 'll tell you this, if their culinary delights are anywhere close to their beer prowess, I 'm about to embark on a gastronomic odyssey worthy of its own epic tale. Stay tuned.However, a word of caution to the guardians of this glorious taproom: be on the lookout for a local yokel with a bloated resemblance to Billy Squier (remember him? If not, Google 's your friend, see below . This fellow, thinking he 's the Rex Reed of Yelp, has been peddling(cause he can no longer drive, I hope his unsolicited opinions around town. Now, I 'd be the last to begrudge a man his drink, but rumor has it he 's recently escaped the clutches of the Florida legal system, sporting a brand new DUI badge of dishonor. For the love of hops, do not I repeat, DO NOT give him a beer. Just point him to the exit and suggest he mounts his trusty scooter, lest he ventures on the roads and graces the headlines once more.All in all, this place is the veritable Mecca for the malt aficionado. Go, relish, and drink responsibly. Cheers!"
